How to help others deal with suffering?
Human suffering is a very complex phenomenon that we all, to a greater or lesser extent, have to deal with. At the moment when you feel that everything is collapsing, there is not much strength or hope to face that situation, which could be: the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, problems with the family, in short, there is an innumerable list of events related to suffering.
Sometimes, it is not us who suffer in the present, perhaps it is the neighbor, the “next.” I take space to congratulate your interest in helping other people, the simple fact of starting to read this blog is evidence of this. While we help others, many experiences and advice can come to our minds to share. Now, it is necessary that these words be considered based on fundamentals and practices that I want to share with you below:
1. MAKE PSYCHOLOGICAL PRESENCE
Psychological presence implies a commitment to person-centered care showing a real interest in their situation. At times, we may be very present physically, however, we may lack psychological presence.
2. ACTIVE LISTENING
Active listening involves paying focused attention to what the person is expressing. Many times we prioritize what we have to say, forgetting what the person has to say. One way to practice active listening is by offering a space where the person can express themselves without interruptions. Furthermore, one should not make the mistake of generalizing a singular experience. The experiences are very unique and suffering is part of the experience.
3. EXPRESS SHOWS OF AFFECTION
Affection allows us to show our feelings through different expressions. These can be words of hope, a hug, a message, a visit, among others. These expressions must be genuine and appropriate to the particular situation so that, even with the best intentions, the person does not feel overwhelmed by the invasion of the desired personal space.
4. DO NOT JUDGE THE PERSON
When people feel judged, their feelings of guilt increase, their self-esteem is affected, and they are likely to immerse themselves further in suffering without finding meaning in it. Remember that we should not be reckless in judging the person who suffers, we should be empathetic to help them in their improvement process.
5. HELP HIM SEEK HELP
In moments when we see another person in deep pain, it is very normal not to know what to say. When that happens, do not feel obliged to say something because sometimes it is enough to accompany the person in their pain. Additionally, you can encourage the person to get help from a mental health professional and help from a spiritual leader. These aids can facilitate the process on the way to a higher quality of life and full of meaning.
Helping others is a completely spiritual act that allows us to be a reflection of God's love for humanity. Helping must transcend ephemeral desire, it must be a community responsibility in love and solidarity. If you want to know more about suffering from a psychological, philosophical and theological perspective, I wrote a Blog that can help you understand this phenomenon and thus be able to serve other people in the right way. I hope this blog is very useful for you!
Photo by Josue Escoto on Unsplash